Illusion – Sometimes you wish…

Illusion

I know it’s hard to tell how mixed up you feel
Hoping what you need is behind every door
Each time you get hurt, I don’t want you to change
Because everyone has hopes, you’re human after all
The feeling sometimes, wishing you were someone else
Feeling as though you never belong
This feeling is not sadness, this feeling is not joy
I truly understand. Please, don’t cry now

Being like you are
Well this is something else, who would comprehend?
But some that do, lay claim
Divine purpose blesses them
That’s not what I believe, and it doesn’t matter anyway
A part of your soul ties you to the next world
Or maybe to the last, but I’m still not sure
But what I do know, is to us the world is different
As we are to the world but I guess you would know that

Please don’t go, I want you to stay
I’m begging you please, please don’t leave here
I don’t want you to hate for all the hurt that you feel
The world is just illusion trying to change you
Please don’t go, I want you to stay
I’m begging you please, oh please don’t leave here
I don’t want you to change
For all the hurt that you feel
This world is just illusion, always trying to change you
[VNV Nation]

VIDEO

This video, inspired me for today’s post. In the moment when I saw the amazing “Uh Oh Makeup” from Slackgirl.
We all know that – sometimes we desire to be something or someone else. Those moments when all those self-doubts devour you from the inside and you just wish to escape your own body or the situation that you are in. But would that really be worth it? It might seem easier on the first view but would you not miss your past, all the things that made you to what you are now? Would this new desire not make it even worse? Would this moment not come again some when – a new desire to again be someone or something else?
I do think those moments let us grow. Each time they happen and we work them through we gain experiences and as well come out of them even stronger.
Secondlife to me was such an escape in the past. When my RL turned upside down, Wicca was my refuge. I know how crazy that must sound, but others find their hide out in alcohol and drugs so for that amount of time where it was really bad, I am happy I had Wicca instead. I always was aware of, that it was a running from reality and I never believed SL could be any kind of reality than a virtual one. So I was well aware of what I did and did not lose myself in a virtual environment completely.
I know we all say, that we know Secondlife is a game and that we always can press the red “X” on the right upper corner. But if you are in SL for 10 years, your avatar and the people around you as well as the things you do become a part of you. Certainly I would not go around and tell my RL friends I am a model in SL and that would count anything towards my RL… if that makes sense. But I can tell about a game that I play and that I use it as my free time fun like others use other things – for example surfing on the internet, doing YouTube videos, doing handicrafts or what ever they enjoy in their free time, besides work and socializing in real life.
Nowadays I am not going to SL to escape anymore. My online times are way shorter as they used to be back then and sometimes I do not log in for days when I have RL appointments or wanna meet friends. The purpose of login in changed, but I still do have fun with Secondlife – just different.
I still enjoy to do things that I could not do in real life and as well I do enjoy designing a lot. To me designing is kinda the same as for others doing handicrafts maybe. Producing something and see how something grows under your fingers until you have a final product. The same applies to blogging and making pictures πŸ˜‰
Secondlife can be an addiction, yes as you can easily lose yourself in it, but if you are aware of that, it can be a nice hideout with lots of fun and meeting amazing people – some even might become part of your real life out there πŸ™‚
For me Secondlife never could replace my real – I do love my life now, but it is a nice way to live parts of your dreams and illusions πŸ˜‰
Details
Clothing & Accessories:
Outfit: Tentacio & Cureless – “Galatea Doll Lolita – Onepiece” (Gacha, for the Galatea Doll Lolita Body)
Necklace: shanghai – “Xana”
Headpiece: [sys] – “Hecate”
Hair & Makeup:
Face Art: Slackgirl – “Uh Oh Makeup” (LeLutka Applier)
Body & Tattoo:
Head: LeLutka – “Simone 3.0”
Skin: YS&YS – “Immortal Skin” (LeLutka Applier)
Body: Tentacio & Cureless – “Galatea Doll Lolita Body” (Gacha, Rare)
Props & Poses:
Fruct0se & Poseidon
Model & Photographer:

Abandoned Asylum @ Night

Asylum 4

Sometimes you get confused, you doubt your own guts and feelings just because you think you know better…

Exactly that feeling I had, when I was trying out different things to get my mind off some things that really afflicted me the last few days.

I was trying out some new releases of [sys], GizzA and Gabriel. On the first view, it looked very strange to put those things together that looked all so different.

The more I played with it, the more it became a certain look I really liked πŸ˜‰

Asylum 1

I started with the “Tristeline Helmet” from [sys]. The helmet is an abstract looking, super cool head with horns and petal looking parts, that comes with a HUD, which lets you change the metal to 4 different types. The helmet was released for the We <3 RP event. The awesome “Glam Jacket” as well was made by [sys]. The open jacket is decorated with filigree chains over the chest and comes in fitted mesh for all the popular mesh bodies as well as in the standard sizes. The skirt is one of the latest releases from GizzA. The “Chloe Asymmetric Skirt” is a great short skirt with amazing details. you can see the seams, and the loose belt decorates the waist knotted into a ribbon shape.

Asylum 2

For the shoes I did not want high heels or something too elegant. It should be something casual with a rough touch. The perfect match made the new “Nicole Boots”. They can be word with or without socks, both versions are available. With the flat sole and the amazing trendy shape they just were right for today’s look.

The awesome earrings are one of the newest releases from Elysium. The “Oriental Delight Earrings” made the perfect contrast for the look. With the graceful silver metals andΒ  the beautiful back gem, they compliment perfectly the filigree chains of the jacket and as well give an elegant, gothic looking touch.

To give back some more weird and as well Asylum insane looking element I put on the “Tattoo Gift Bruises” by Coca & Wolf and the ripped stockings from insanya.

Asylum 5

All the scary, cool and realistic furniture for the scenery, were made by 22769. It is part of a full set called the Abandoned Asylum. The set contains 15 items. For this post i just used the “Asylum Bed”, the “Drawercase”, the”Fire Extinguisher”, the “Portable Oxygen Tank”, the “Screen” and the “Crutches”

Sometimes out of weird moods, cool looks and an idea is born. So not always a bad or weird mood only is a bad thing if you look back on it with some distance πŸ˜‰

Asylum 3

Details

Jacket: [sys] – “Glam Jacket” – NEW

Skirt: GizzA – “Chloe Asymmetric Skirt” – NEW

Stockings: :::insanya::: – “Stockings and Knee Socks n.4”

Boots: ::GB:: – “Nicole Boots+Socks” – NEW

Headpiece: [sys] – “Tristeline Helmet” – NEW @ We <3 RP

Earrings: Elysium – “Oriental Delight Earrings”

Furniture: 22769 – “Abandoned Asylum”

Poses: Del May

Model & Photographer: Wicca Merlin

Asylum 6