Waiting sometimes is so worth it…

Today I do have a premiere on my blog… It is the first post as a LeLutka blogger! For years I felt not confident with applying for LeLutka, I always felt like I am not yet there where I would stand behind myself enough to dare to apply for a blogger position for LeLutka. I do not know how to explain, it was just a feeling. Then I saw a picture of Mavi Beck – I know her a long time already… we met at AVENUE years ago –  on Flickr. I adore her art work, she has a very special feeling for shadow and lights in my view. When I looked at her stream again, I remembered that she is a LeLutka CSR and again the blogging desire for LeLutka came up to my mind. In her profile she as well stated she is a LeLutka Blogger Manager and so I went to my flickr, looked over my recent pictures, took a deep breath and dared to ask her what the conditions for blogging would be. As always she was super kind and nice – I do not remember that I saw her mad EVER – and told me, that LeLutka does work with Blogotex now too and that I could always fill in an application at the access point at the main store. Driven by my desire to blog for LeLutka, I TPed to their main store and while I was rezzing and looking for the access point sign, my doubts again fell back on me and I became a chicken again and TPed back home. I have no clue, why I feel that way when it comes to LeLutka, but I remember LeLutka always as one of the top stores of SL. Back when I started modeling, we had no mesh heads or bento or all that stuff and LeLutka was one of the most high class fashion brand with the top notch fashion ideas and not only for casual desires. Even back then I loved their creations already and blogged them a few times, when I was able to afford their designs (https://www.flickr.com/photos/wiccamerlin/4261277578/in/dateposted-public/ or https://www.flickr.com/photos/wiccamerlin/4449981194/in/dateposted-public/) Back I would not even dared to think about being a blogger for LeLutka, because I just started blogging and they only had super models and awesome graphical artists in their blogger group, but it always was a dream of mine…

Ok… back to the present 😉 So I was at home again thinking about, if I would bee good enough to apply for the blogger position at LeLutka. I guess it is the high respect I do have for the designers skills and the fact that LeLutka plays in the designer circle for so long and all of my old idols and icons of the modeling world back then did blog for them, made me judge about myself so hard. But after a few days of thinking about it, I thought that I would have nothing to loose by trying. Either they like my work or they don’t and so I went back to the LeLutka main store, hit the access button and filled the application. They already asked for a certain time period to allow them to review my application and so I forced myself to not look up Blogotex every 15 minutes, because iI was so nervous *blushes*

Even if they already asked for a certain period of time the longer I had to wait the more my doubts had party in my brain again… so when they pop-up in Second Life went up with a notification and the black letters on the blue background with the “Accepted” sentence, I jumped in my chair and started squealing, my partner asked me “If I would not have all the cups in the cupboard anymore” (a German quote – I don’t know if that would make much sense in English. When I put it into the translator I got “to have lost one’s marbles”). I really was uber happy and it was hard to calm down for me. I have no idea, I am not a child anymore, but in that moment I felt like one again. That again shows me, sometimes it is worth waiting until the time is right 🙂

I guess it is a no brainer to mention I had to start instant to work on the pictures for my first blog post. I chose “Korina” to be my first official LeLutka post. “Korina was the latest release for the Skin Fair this year and so I started to work on a shape first and then the hard choice of a skin came up. First I thought I would use the original skin, but the I thought, the original skin already is shown on the vendor and I have to be a little more creative and make ‘my’ Korina. To me “Korina” did not appear like a princess, more like a strong adult female with attitude and so I tried to bring Wicca to “Korina”, but not making her a sister… if that makes sense.

The head comes with the usual great quality standard HUD that LeLutka always provides, but you get something new with “Korina” as well. The HUD has now 2 different hair bases to chose from, based on the default SL UV maps. I will cross my fingers that maybe the older heads will get updated with that too, because I really love that feature 🙂

I will play now a littlemore with my new “Korina” head and who knows.. maybe we have another side of “Korina” here soon *winks*

Clothing

Top: Meva – “Alexis”

Pants: adorsy – “Rihanna Jeans Shorts” (Maitreya)

Shoes: UTOPIA@Design – “Azaria” (Maitreya)

Accessories

Earrings: Aurealis – “Statement Earrings”

Rings: Meva – “Maitreya Rings Silver” (Maitreya, Bento)

Hair & Makeup

Hair: no.match – “No.Commitment”

Makeup: Zibska – “Noir Pack 06” (Maitreya Applier)

Lipstick: alaskametro<3 – “London Lipstick” (Maitreya Applier)

Body & Tattoo

Head: LeLutka – “Korina 3.3.1”

Body: Maitreya – “Lara 4.1”

Skin: YS&YS – “Petal Tone 02” (LeLutka & Maitreya Applier)

Tattoo: BODY MOD – “Memories” (OMEGA Applier) Store Closed

Poses & Props

Poses: Foxcity

Backdrop: Pseudo “Paul T Scene Backdrop” (Gacha, Rare)

Model & Photographer

Wicca Merlin

At the Airport…

Clothing

Top: Gizza – “Oversize Knit Top” (now Giz Seorn)

Pants: Lassitude & Ennui – “Hisa Leather Leggings” (Maitreya Applier)

Shoes: {Livalle} – “Hax Combat Boots” (Maitreya)

Accessories

Bags: Gizza – “Gathered Tote Bag [BW]” (now Giz Seorn), LaGyo – “The Desperado Bag – Bicolor”, The Oak – “Phynto Bag” & Indyra – “Last Call Tote: London Calling”

Hair & Makeup

Hair: no.match – “No.Commission”

Makeup: alaskametro<3 – “Mariposa” (LeLutka Applier)

Lipstick: alaskametro<3 – “London” (LeLutka Applier)

Body & Tattoo

Head: LeLutka – “Simone 3.3”

Body: Maitreya – “Lara 4.1”

Ears: ^^Swallow^^ – “Darkness Ears”

Poses & Props

Pose: Selfmade

Backdrop: Pseudo – “Baggage Claim Scene”

Model & Photographer

Wicca Merlin

Just the Way I am

TUNES

Maybe I’ma get a little anxious
Maybe I’ma get a little shy
‘Cause everybody’s trying to be famous
And I’m just trying to find a place to hide
All I wanna do is just hold somebody
But no one ever wants to get to know somebody
I don’t even know how to explain this
I don’t even think I’m gonna try
And that’s okay
I promise myself one dayI’ma tell ’em all that you could either hate me or love me
But that’s just the way I am
[Charlie Puth]

I rarely dress up to go shopping, clubbing or socializing – Usually I just wear the last outfit I blogged as I had that styled up anyways :p But today I felt not really blogging and I just put on some things I bought lately. With each piece I added I liked the look more – something I really did not feel for a long time and I have to admit… I like it! So this will be an “unscheduled” just the way I am picture series 🙂 This look could be something I could imagine wearing on tour, or on stage with the band as well.

Yesterday I had a blast and it happened out of the blue… Nefertiti Kimagawa IMed me! I did not hear from her in ages and I was totally excited when I saw her IM popping up. We talked a little while about what we had done in the meantime and when I told her, I did open my own store she came over to see it. Certainly I had to TP down and when I landed I saw a tall, awesome demon. It really reminded me of good old times and we indulged in reminiscences about her store and as well about Claim the Fame, a designers contest we did years ago with SL Art Couture. Nefer was one of the contestants. I even still had a vendor picture where she used me as a model for an outfit and helmet called Wicca – I still remember how honored I felt when she named it after me. All of a sudden I saw an orange cloud right beside us – Nefer TPed someone… it was Kalyabreeaa Capelo! The designer of Mad Diva and my personal hero for the first avant garde bikini back in 2011 (https://wiccamerlin.de/can-swimwear-be-avantgarde-or-couture-mad-diva-shows-it/) It felt so crazy, to have 2 old friends in our store now, while I was blogging for them years ago, when I worked as a model *snickers* I tried to convince both of them to design again, as I really miss their awesome, crazy and avant garde ideas!

I never thought it would be so much fun to roll back in time for a few moments and think about all the cool things we did – but it really felt amazing and it put a smile on my face. I hope that it won’t take as long until we meet again 🙂

As if that would not already have been the best evening for ages, Kaly mentioned she would TP another “model granny” over and before I could ask – Latrelly Flux rezzed in! OMG that really became a dinosaur revival :p I did not see all of them in ages, neither we talked, but it felt so good to se them again and while we were talking, it became more and more as we would have never stopped talking. I again felt like the dwarf between those ladies – as always – even if I am now not as high as I used to be as a model… even back then I was the tiniest 😉

I do not wanna roll back the time, but we really had great times back then. Modeling was completely different.. and alive.We did not have as many events and designers really created full collections a few time of the year and not just one new outfit for a monthly event. We had Fashion Weeks or Designer Showcases to release their newest collections and it was really fun. They booked us for vendor shoots and I remember very well how honored and proud we felt, being used as vendor model – It really was a privilege and sometimes we even got paid for it.

I do not want to say, in the past everything was better – things change with time and future not just brings negative things, if you are able to develop and adapt new ways of doing tings. It is hard to release the past, especially if it was a nice one, but even if things change and force you to change it can be something good. Most of the time if you stick too hard to the past, it will hurt you and as well it will stop you from developing forward. I learned that more than once, but if you made your peace with that – it isn’t that painful and more and it happens way faster and easier, as if you fight against it everyday 🙂

I hope I made sense with what I was trying to say… in the end I am no native English speaker, but I try my best 😉

Outfit

Top: [CX] – “Mucronate Top – Leather” (Maitreya)

Pants: adorsy – “Marilice Pants Jeans Original” (Maitreya)

Shoes: **UTOPIA@Design** – “Rebeca” (Maitreya)

Accessories

Necklace: .:E.A.Studio:. – “Borg Necklaces (Girl)”

Bracelets (right): [ kunst ] – “Conrad Bracelet / Female” & Taylor Bracelets (F)”

Bracelet (left): amias – “Jasna black”

Rings: FORMANAILS – “Accessories for Maitreya Bento – Rings Simple” (Maitreya, Bento)

Nailpolish: Dark Passsions – “Koffin Nails – Mist Connection” (Maitreya Applier)

Septum: [ kunst ] – “Anuket Septum Ring”

Lips Piercing: [CX] – “Spiked Gloss”

Hair & Makeup

Hair: .shi – “Eirene / Her”

Body & Tattoo

Body: Maitreya – “Lara 4.1”

Head: LeLutka – “Simone 3.3”

Ears: .:E.A.Studio:. – “Ears Gomory”

Tattoo: [White~Widow] – “Replicas” (Maitreya Applier)

Poses & Props

Background: Pseudo– “Paul T Scene Backdrop” (Gacha, Rare)

Poses: Foxcity – “Legs for Days” & “Sits Vol1” (Bento)

Model & Photographer

Wicca Merlin