Illusion – Sometimes you wish…

Illusion

I know it’s hard to tell how mixed up you feel
Hoping what you need is behind every door
Each time you get hurt, I don’t want you to change
Because everyone has hopes, you’re human after all
The feeling sometimes, wishing you were someone else
Feeling as though you never belong
This feeling is not sadness, this feeling is not joy
I truly understand. Please, don’t cry now

Being like you are
Well this is something else, who would comprehend?
But some that do, lay claim
Divine purpose blesses them
That’s not what I believe, and it doesn’t matter anyway
A part of your soul ties you to the next world
Or maybe to the last, but I’m still not sure
But what I do know, is to us the world is different
As we are to the world but I guess you would know that

Please don’t go, I want you to stay
I’m begging you please, please don’t leave here
I don’t want you to hate for all the hurt that you feel
The world is just illusion trying to change you
Please don’t go, I want you to stay
I’m begging you please, oh please don’t leave here
I don’t want you to change
For all the hurt that you feel
This world is just illusion, always trying to change you
[VNV Nation]

VIDEO

This video, inspired me for today’s post. In the moment when I saw the amazing “Uh Oh Makeup” from Slackgirl.
We all know that – sometimes we desire to be something or someone else. Those moments when all those self-doubts devour you from the inside and you just wish to escape your own body or the situation that you are in. But would that really be worth it? It might seem easier on the first view but would you not miss your past, all the things that made you to what you are now? Would this new desire not make it even worse? Would this moment not come again some when – a new desire to again be someone or something else?
I do think those moments let us grow. Each time they happen and we work them through we gain experiences and as well come out of them even stronger.
Secondlife to me was such an escape in the past. When my RL turned upside down, Wicca was my refuge. I know how crazy that must sound, but others find their hide out in alcohol and drugs so for that amount of time where it was really bad, I am happy I had Wicca instead. I always was aware of, that it was a running from reality and I never believed SL could be any kind of reality than a virtual one. So I was well aware of what I did and did not lose myself in a virtual environment completely.
I know we all say, that we know Secondlife is a game and that we always can press the red “X” on the right upper corner. But if you are in SL for 10 years, your avatar and the people around you as well as the things you do become a part of you. Certainly I would not go around and tell my RL friends I am a model in SL and that would count anything towards my RL… if that makes sense. But I can tell about a game that I play and that I use it as my free time fun like others use other things – for example surfing on the internet, doing YouTube videos, doing handicrafts or what ever they enjoy in their free time, besides work and socializing in real life.
Nowadays I am not going to SL to escape anymore. My online times are way shorter as they used to be back then and sometimes I do not log in for days when I have RL appointments or wanna meet friends. The purpose of login in changed, but I still do have fun with Secondlife – just different.
I still enjoy to do things that I could not do in real life and as well I do enjoy designing a lot. To me designing is kinda the same as for others doing handicrafts maybe. Producing something and see how something grows under your fingers until you have a final product. The same applies to blogging and making pictures πŸ˜‰
Secondlife can be an addiction, yes as you can easily lose yourself in it, but if you are aware of that, it can be a nice hideout with lots of fun and meeting amazing people – some even might become part of your real life out there πŸ™‚
For me Secondlife never could replace my real – I do love my life now, but it is a nice way to live parts of your dreams and illusions πŸ˜‰
Details
Clothing & Accessories:
Outfit: Tentacio & Cureless – “Galatea Doll Lolita – Onepiece” (Gacha, for the Galatea Doll Lolita Body)
Necklace: shanghai – “Xana”
Headpiece: [sys] – “Hecate”
Hair & Makeup:
Face Art: Slackgirl – “Uh Oh Makeup” (LeLutka Applier)
Body & Tattoo:
Head: LeLutka – “Simone 3.0”
Skin: YS&YS – “Immortal Skin” (LeLutka Applier)
Body: Tentacio & Cureless – “Galatea Doll Lolita Body” (Gacha, Rare)
Props & Poses:
Fruct0se & Poseidon
Model & Photographer:

Explode!

eveformanails-01

There’s something I should get off my chest
I’m losing my mind and my life’s a mess.
Well everyone says do this and do that
Maybe they’re right
I feel like I’m gonna…….
EXPLODE.. I’M GONNA EXPLODE
It is so big yet I feel so small
It’s even in your shopping mall
Is my life wasting away
Don’t throw it away that’s what they say
I don’t wanna go out and fail
Yet I fail at home every day
I wonder someday if I’ll look back
With regrets on how I lived
Each way I turn I turn my back
Each time I turn I always look back
I’m trying to please everyone I don’t know how
I feel like I’m gonna…….
EXPLODE.. I’M GONNA EXPLODE

eveformanails-02
What should I do I really don’t know
Should I stay home or should I go
Well I’m struggling with my sanity
Is my life crumbling in front of me.
Oh.
Do you know how it feels?
To feel like you’re gonna explode
Do you ever feel
Like you’re gonna explode.
EXPLODE.

[The Unseen]

eveformanails-03

Details

Outfit: Sakide – “Impulse”

Shoes: :)(: Pixelfashion – “Vanina Boots”

Mask: PurpleMoon – “Lost Heart”

Nails & Handwraps: Formanails – “Scarabeus”

Hair: EMO-tions – “Tommy”

Scene: E.V.E Studio – “Broken Chains {The Bomb}”

Model & Photographer: Wicca Merlin

In a certain mood… playing with poses

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Sometimes I really do like just roaming through my poses to see, if I can find any inspiration or develop some ideas based on poses.

This time I just put on one of my favourite fantasy skins lately, the “Amalthea” skin from La Petite Morte. I rarely saw such a light skin that still had all those wonderful details and it is still not white, it has a very dreamy tone.it comes in different versions, which follow an inspiration of the “Last Unicorn” One of them even has the darker star on the forehead where the unicorn of the enchanted Princess Amalthea is supposed to be, like we saw it in the movie πŸ™‚

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The cool tattoo comes from TAOX Tattoos. I found it at the J&A Expo this year and with the amazing details and the huge size all over the body, I have to admit it pulled my view on that brand as i never heard about it before. As a tattoo addicted, you never can have enough places for good tattoos πŸ˜‰

TAOX provides appliers for nearly all popular mesh bodies and as well an Omega applier. The pack does not include any default avatar layer so you only can wear it with one of the mesh bodies.

The amazing horn on my forehead, was made by AiShA for the last round of the Enchantment event. For the hair I wanted something wild but still innocent and so my decision fell on the “Pocahontas” hairstyle from LeLutka. With the lightly windblown touch it looked perfect to the innocent vulnerable look of an enchanted unicorn πŸ˜‰

White Room 1

But now back to ‘random posing’ πŸ˜‰

Sometimes I really do like to go through my poses and just make it a challenge to shoot every pose I opened with the outfit I am wearing

That sometimes means to change the angle, if some parts would look awkward.Β  As well you can turn and rotate the pose stand to get an interesting angle. At times I get a weird feeling or view, but I still snap it, because sometimes later, when I work on it, it becomes more interesting as I thought on the first view πŸ˜‰ Shadows can do a big part as well to hide minor issues or errors. If nothing help, you always have the possibility to crop your picture. That as well sometimes gives a neat new view as originally thought. Sometimes you maybe just safe a shot with cropping it and other times the crop looks way more expressive and interesting.

Certainly it is easier, when you wear something that sticks close to the body. Some gowns or dresses can make a challenge like this nearly impossible. The “Siren ” ensemble from Pixicat was perfect for that purpose.

White Room 2

Details

Outfit: Pixicat – “Siren Nr 1” (Gacha @ Main store)

Unicorn Horn: AiShA – “Armor Unicorn Horn”

Hair: LeLutka – “Pocahontas”

Skin: La Petite Morte – “Amalthea Skin”

Tattoo: TAOX – “Kenza”

Model & Photographer: Wicca Merlin

White Room 5